My mother's day post, but it's not about my mom.
"In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" Acts 20:35
This Woman. I can't say enough. I actually don't really know where to start. She is a servant and that describes it best. She has always been the first to get something done, she's always offering her part, and always done it joyfully. When she first came into my life many years ago when Kev and I were dating she was doing her best work. The work where she tirelessly devoted herself to her mom and dad and her mother in law. Organizing their lives and filling their needs, in every open space she could fit herself into. Her father was extremely sick and in a courageous cancer battle he fought for years. Her mother never left his side, and Shirley never tired of serving them. Her mother in law was so amazing. I have more stories of her than I can count and I knew her to many less years than I wish. She loved on this woman more than I have ever seen anyone love. MeeMaw could be harsh but Shirley showered her with patience and affection over and over again. That is how I met this woman. Always giving herself endlessly and not thinking for a second how she may be impacting those around us, simply watching her clearly follow God's instruction, and truly loved while doing it.
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you." Exodus 20:12
Now I am experiencing the fullness of her, her love, and her service. God has changed things between us, he has blessed our relationship and made it now a beautiful thing. She has stepped into our hard, and served me, Kev, and our babies more than she even knows. When my mom left I was devastated because I simply didn't think I would be able to do this without her. Shirley came right along, and filled that gap overflowing. She has encouraged me, held me and cried with me, prayed with me, given all the support and advice, and loved HUGE. She has driven up here every Tuesday since my mom left. She spends the night, and wakes up with the kids most the day while I sleep. She probably sleeps for days when she goes back home, but she comes with energy and joy for me and for my loves. She has prayed with us every Tuesday night for my shot, fed, us, cleaned up after us, and listened to us. We are a mess here, and she came right into our big scattered everywhere mess and helped picked it all up and keep it in place. She is also a fellow survivor, and did raise my most favorite person on earth. If you have a mother in law, be thankful. Don't waste time tearing her down, she may be trying really hard. What blessings may abound if you let her do the work for which God has made her! She also may be at any moment the angel that flys in to take care of you, and support you, in possibly the hardest season in your entire life. Be thankful for family, and all those God has chosen to be yours, however easy or hard that looks. I know this seems easier for me to say, but if tomorrow wasn't here who was with you to get through today? She is few and far between friends, and has a beautiful story to tell. I've tried to thank her, to tell her what an example she has been to me with her life. I've apologized for not loving her more deeply and probably should for many more things. So here is my mothers day post. Not to my mom, although I could write one of those too. This is to my mother in "love" because she deserves these words and more. So does your mother in law, and thank her now incase you miss that chance. If you don't have a mother in law yet, one day you may, and she will be a blessing to you. Look for it, you will see. Shirley Thank you. I could say much more, but you are a blessing to me, and always will be. You have shown Jesus to me countless times over. "For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45
I've handled this week well and have the motivation and stamina to go one more week of hard and get a break. There is something about being able to see the surface and get a breath that is way more managable to me. At first they said forever, welcome to cancer. Then they said here's a year of treatment and that seemed like buckling down to climb a mountain never ending, and now she said just 2, 2 weeks. I feel like I can see around the bend in the curve even though it's a sharp turn and I feel like I can do hard and feel bad knowing relief will come shortly. So I am going to do this week hard and then recoup next week. Who knows how long this will last, we hope through October, but time will tell. For now, we do today, and that is going to be rough, but I've made it every week and I will this time too.
As we are working on switching my schedule around some, and by the request of my amazing therapist, I bought one of those huge desktop calendars. She told me how great would it be for the kids to see all the good and fun coming, even if its just a few weeks at a time, but it seems the month of May comes with lots of activities. Most of these fun things are the kids things and they are full of energy and smiles thinking about fun things to come. Like our trip out West to Phoenix to visit our bests. This calendar allows them to not see all mommas sick days and all my doctor appointments but instead allows them to see good, fun to look forward to. They need that right now, and for the summer for sure. As I began to write in school things to remember, picnics, and such, I was reminded of the last time we bought a desktop calendar. My mom was here and I received the news of the cancer spread. We, instead of adding to the calendar fun, were clearing the calendar, writing in schedules, doctors appointment, and who would be here to help what days. I never had the vision then to see now that we would be doing ok. I'm so thankful for here, and for now. I spent my first mothers day in 8 years being more Joyful than I had been before. I didn't even care if their were fights, I was just happy to hear bickering. I'm going to tackle this first summer fighting cancer and live with Joy and thankfulness everyday. I am heading into the next few months doing treatment while trying to be full time summer time mom. And I couldn't be more excited and thankful for everyday that is coming. I have no expectations of how anything will go, which is probably how most of my previous summer should have been arranged, but there are so many things different this year. So many more reasons to see God in today, and in every part of whats to come. Ive always said if we could just get a glimpse of what goodness will come, and then I always smile because I realize that allows me to trust him way less. So I need to trust him more now, and smile at his goodness later, because no matter what my life, my summer, or my exceptions become. He is still good.
"Thank Me in the midst of the crucible. When things seem all wrong, look for growth opportunities. Especially, look for areas where you need to let go, leaving your cares in My able hands. Do you trust Me to orchestrate your life events as I choose, or are you still trying to make things go according to your will? If you keep trying to carry out your intentions while I am leading you in another direction, you deify your desires.Be on the lookout for what I am doing in your life. Worship Me by living close to Me, thanking Me in all circumstances." Jesus Calling
"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18
So I will take my injection tonight and then have a week off. After that I will do my treatment on Wednesday nights. The switch is better for our family for may reasons. Since we are working around my days not feeling well and when we most need help everything will shift a bit. Kev's work schedule is demanding on Wednesdays and it's been hard for 8 months but we have worked it out. We will for sure need help some days this summer where I will be with the kids and am tired and need some interference run. I know God will provide for every need all along the way. Many of you have offered to help, it may have been months ago but I may be taking some of you up on your offers. It's funny how my anxiety is non existent in knowing we will be taken care of, that my friends is all you. You have helped and shown up, and even if you have done nothing but pray you are part of our team. We are getting through because I know you are walking with us.
The elders from our church came tonight and prayed for me, for us. It was a blessing. To have a room full of awesome men of Christ praying encouragement and hope into our lives was beautiful. God's presence is so real in this place, in me for sure, but also totally in also the drivers seat.. Showing me his amazing plan, his beautiful people, and this gives me hope in my days, and a heart overflowing full of joy.
Where Does Joy Come from?
Paul was an extraordinary man. He knew how to rejoice when things went well. But, as the Lord said, even the gentiles rejoice when things go well. Nothing especially Christian about that. What is extraordinary about Paul is how unbelievably durable his joy was when things weren’t going well. For example: “I am overflowing with joy in all our affliction” (2 Corinthians 7:4). Or “Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake” (Colossians 1:24).
Where did this come from? First of all it was taught by Jesus: “Blessed are you when men hate you ... Be glad in that day, and leap for joy, for behold, your reward is great in heaven” (Luke 6:22-23). Troubles for Jesus compound your interest in heaven—which last a lot longer than earth.
Second, it comes from the Holy Spirit, not our own efforts or imagination or family upbringing. “The fruit of the Spirit is ... joy” (Galatians 5:22). “You received the word in much tribulation with the joy of the Holy Spirit” (1Thessalonians 1:6).
Third, it comes from belonging to the kingdom of God. “The kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit” (Romans 14:17).
Fourth, it comes through faith, that is, from believing God. “Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing” (Romans 15:13). “I know that I shall remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy of faith” (Philippians 1:25).
Fifth, it comes from seeing and knowing Jesus as Lord. “Rejoice in the Lord always” (Philippians 4:4).
Sixth, it comes from fellow believers who work hard to help us focus on these sources of joy, rather than deceitful circumstances. “We are workers with you for your joy” (2 Corinthians 1:24).
Seventh, it comes from the sanctifying effects of tribulations. “We also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope” (Romans 5:3-4). “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing” (James 1:2-4).
If we are not yet like Paul, he calls us to be. “Be imitators of me as I am of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1). And for most of us this is a call to earnest prayer. It is a supernatural life.
Learning Paul-type joy,
John Piper
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